5 Life-changing swaps for 2023 that you can start now!

It’s almost that time again, when we make a list of goals or resolutions for the New Year. Sometimes this works well... but more often than not, it doesn’t.

There’s a whole heap of reasons why we don’t achieve a lot of our goals, (the top 5 reasons I believe that cause this are here, but today I want to talk about a different approach for getting you from where you are now, to where you want to be by introducing you to some life-changing swaps.

These powerful, positive swaps can be done at any time, are available to everyone and won’t cost you a penny!

Curious? You should be!

Let’s get into it

1. Blaming others - Taking responsibility.

You must take 100% responsibility for your life, failure to do so will mean never meeting your full potential. This includes the results you produce, the quality of your relationships, the success of your career- everything! It isn’t easy, we’ve been conditioned to blame others for the things we aren’t happy with in our life. We blame our bosses, our partners, strangers on the internet, the weather, the moon…. the list is endless. This is because it’s so much easier to look externally than internally. Trust me, I know because I did this for 10 years! I was unhappy at work and blamed my boss, the economic climate, the company I worked for, my colleagues etc. It was only when I took responsibility and was honest with myself and admitted that the real reason I was unhappy was that I had stayed in a job I didn’t like instead of facing up to my fears and making the changes I needed to make. My challenge to you is this: think of an area of your life that you are unhappy with and ask yourself ‘what am I doing to create this situation and/or allow it to happen?’

2. Making Excuses - Finding a way.

Why do we make excuses? In my experience, it’s usually due to one of two reasons. Reason number one is that we don’t want the thing enough. We might be interested in the thing but we're not committed to it. When we are interested in something we do it when it’s convenient, but when we are committed, we take action regardless and accept zero excuses. Reason number two is that it’s hard to be honest with ourselves. It’s so much easier to tell ourselves we don’t have time, we're too busy with other stuff, and we don’t have enough money than it is to be brutally honest with ourselves about why we are staying stuck in situations we are unhappy with.

I want you to think about that goal you set last year, what’s the real reason you didn’t achieve it and what will you do differently to not make the same mistake this year?

3. People pleasing - Pleasing yourself

Question: Do you know what will happen if you spend your time on this earth as a watered-down version of yourself just so other people like you?

Answer: You won’t like yourself.

People pleasing causes feelings of anger, frustration, resentment and unfulfilment, to name just a few.

It’s time to embrace some more 'you-based' thinking and decision-making and a small and simple way you can make progress here is to start having an opinion instead of just going with the flow. Here are some examples of things you can say instead of saying ‘ I don’t mind’

• Tea, please!

• I prefer if you drive

• I would rather come straight home after the meal

• Let’s get together at your house

• Can you book the table, please

4. Putting it off - Making a start

Have you ever had the intention of doing something but never actually made it happen because you were waiting for the right time to start/to feel ready/ until the stars align blah blah blah… you know the drill.

It’s so easy to do, especially for the perfectionists amongst us who cannot contemplate the thought of a less-than-perfect outcome. The thing is though, you can be perfect or you can be productive, but you can't be both.

You can't turn back time, tomorrow is not guaranteed for any of us, so the only time we really have is now.

The best way to get ahead is to get started, what small (tiny if needed) step can you take today that will get you closer to the outcome you desire?

5. Staying Small - Taking up space

There are so many amazing, incredible women not experiencing the satisfaction and success that they deserve in their lives and careers because they are holding themselves back, are you one of them? Are you constantly sitting on the side-lines watching other people enjoy the promotion/pay rise/secondment whilst you miss out again? But you didn’t miss out because you’re not capable, did you? The only difference between them and you is that they went for it and you didn’t.

So, it’s time to look at the different areas of your life and start taking up space, one area at a time, where would you like to start first?

So, there we have it, 5 life-changing swaps for 2023 that you can start now!

Interested in getting some 1:1 support in 2023?

You can read about the different coaching support options here.

Still got questions or want to chat about your needs?

Pop me an email over to leanne@youfirstcoach.co.uk and let’s get the conversation started!

Speak soon,

Leanne x